Friday, June 22, 2012
What a Girl Wants
It was a date. A date I couldn't get out of with Xander. Not that he was completely putting pressure on me, but he decided he'd come over.
I squeezed my eyes tight. What had I done? Still, I didn't want to wish myself out of it. Not like it was a major commitment. It would be more like a test of some sort. See just what sort of charisma I did have going on. Was it evil? Or dark?
I'm pretty sure I'm not like that. I didn't think ,anyway.
"Dad? How did you exactly meet Mom?" I asked as soon as I found him in the kitchen digging for a snack before dinner. He couldn't wait long enough for the pasta stir-fry that was sizzling in the kitchen.
"Its kind of foggy." He told me with kind of a laugh. "Sort of like a dream, perhaps." He looked at me with little smile as if he might be remembering something sweet. Now, those days were long gone. It was as if she'd slipped away from our lives. She wished to be alone.
I couldn't help but think... perhaps she'd put a spell on Dad and she couldn't deal. Maybe she never really loved him, but he was so endearing and I knew he still loved her. I could even feel it. Especially, the way he was toward me. He never said bad things about her.
"Oh." This brought me back to the reality of Xander. I was putting myself in the same sort of position. Now wasn't I?
That is ..if...my mother is actually a witch. Which meant, I was a witch too.
But there were no dark demons honing in.. on taking away this foolish power of mine.
Suddenly, I felt like an idiot. I did not have any power. Over anyone nor anything. Besides did my dog ever listen to me when I told her to sit? Or did the cat ever scoot when he was in the good spot on the couch.
Suddenly, I felt so stupid. How could I think I was really special? Obviously, I wasn't.
Yet, perhaps I wanted to plunge deep in oblivion. Especially, when Xander showed up early.
Yes, he was there just in time for dinner. Dad was jovial about the matter. And I'd made enough for three people. It was...like magic.
There I went again. But I swear Xander's smile was intoxicating. And honestly, I couldn't even remember what that girl looked like at the library that I'd seen him with.
"But, but what about your girlfriend?" I needed to know, as we were getting ready to watch the DVD he'd brought over.
"What girlfriend?" His wince was infectious.
"You know? At the library?" I was trying my best not to fall for his smile nor his essences, there on the couch.
"Oh, her." He shrugged. "She's like a sister to me."
Suddenly, I felt comfortable with Xander. I wished things were amazing for Aidan and Marla, too. Sigh of relief as I popped a fluffy kernel of popcorn in Xander's mouth.
When we cuddled, it felt like old times. Although, it was very new.