Emmy and Tara

Tara really wasn't sure if she would make it to lunch. She caught herself almost nodding off in her literature class.

"Wake up! You look like shite." Emmy snapped her right out of it. Perhaps. Just before class was over.

Tara blinked.

"Where you, been?" As it was Tara didn't meet Emmy in their usual spot, by the steps of the school. Most mornings Emmy's dad dropped her off. Neither could drive and Emmy dared not to walk. After all, their were so many bullies.

Tara stared at Emmy now, thinking this bullying might be a disease and perhaps Emmy might have a good bout of it. Although, Emmy was just being Emmy. Her way of concern.

Still, she knew it was coming. Emmy would harp on how Tara dressed. Why wasn't she using her smart phone? Didn't she get the net?

After a bit of nagging, Emmy went into her future date with Harry. One would have thought he was the prince the way she went on about him. He took her places. He was gentleman and a very carrying person.

"What are you doing, tonight?" She asked later at the dining hall where they were looking at their sandwiches that Tara was sure she could wolf down Emmy's ham and cheese as well as her own.

"Jonesy asked me to dinner." Tara just said as if Emmy couldn't make such a big deal of it, after all this time.

"Jonesy!" Emmy made a face of disgust. "You can't be serious."

Tara only nodded as she took a big bite of her sandwich.

"No..no..I can't have this..You know, how much I hate him. You, can not seriously be friends with him. You can't!" She demanded.

"But I said I would. I have too." Tara squinted wishing Emmy wouldn't be in such a tizzy.

"Why? Why would you?" Emmy wanted to know.

"Because I promised Dad." Tara found herself in a lie, but she couldn't think of anything else to say.

Emmy festered a frown. "If he says anything about me, you'd tell me, wouldn't you?"

Tara kept chewing of the crusty bread thick with mayo, tomato and lettuce and of course turkey. What she'd give for a pickle, but she nodded at Emmy's question. She supposed it was the least she could do.

Emmy and Tara

Tara wasn't sure she should be here. It was so silent at the school. Was there a holiday or a fieldtrip she'd forgot about?

She guessed it was still early. But the halls were so long, she now noticed. Perhaps  it was an accident she passed by lost and found. There were some good stuff in the big wooden box. Like the old faded jeans so soft and worn. Not even a hole for fashion. She slipped them over her leggings and found a nice flowing top to wear over her ribbed undershirt.

Tara would take her chances. The worst that could happen was to be sent to the Dean. Her stomach growl and she shivered as to not think of hunger. Maybe she was sick.

"Was that a lion, I just heard." Someone spoke from behind her, making her jump ever so slightly. It was Jonesy. Emmy's old something. Well, they were friends once, and then they dated and now they didn't. Jonesy was in his footballer gear.

"On your way out?" It felt like ages since they'd talked.

"No, just coming in. I did a few run threws on my own." He was headed to the boys dressing room. "Why are, you here?"

"I dunno. Just felt like it I guess." She held on to her old coat and followed back to where she'd came.

"You look...surprisingly tired Tara, how about some crisps?" He walked backwards watching her a bit, and then turned toward the gym. "Lets see whats in the machine. Why don't we?" He smiled ever so endearing while he fed the vending machine coins and  punched in numbers for their make-do breakfast on the bench near the inside swimming pool.

"So-Tar? What gives?" He opened the crisps and handed her over the energy drink. Of course, it was full of natural ingredients. Otherwise the school, wouldn't keep such rot.

"What do you mean?" She looked him straight in the eye. "I think Em's seeing someone at the Uni."

"I didn't ask about Em. I want to know where you been. There's a sale sign on your house, and you and your Dad don't live there, anymore." He was straight lipped as tore into some biscuits and cut an apple in half.

Instantly she felt a melt down coming as she bit into the slice of apple.

"Oh. You know, about that?" She pressed her lips tight hoping he didn't notice, but he handed her his handkerchief.  "Do you think, Em knows?" She cleared her thought.

"Who gives a shite, what Em knows." He grinned. "If you need anything. Anything, Tara, will you let me know?"

"I'm fine." She told him. Although, she thought she might choke on the food before she could enjoy it.

"Yeah, that's your answer for everything." He sighed as he left her the bag of crisps. "You're coming to dinner tonight, I'll meet you, after school." Jonesy got up to put his trash away. "I know your last class is maths." He smirked.

Tara only nodded. She hadn't been to his house since his birthday last year, when he was seeing Emmy.

Emmy and Tara

Tara remembered the bomb fire, thick with smoke. The smoke in her lungs too, but of a different kind. The stuff that made her heavy with sleep, maybe dreamy.

The girl with the red dreads danced around her and finally she dance with her. She told her, her name was Kia, but Tara only giggled.

"That can't be your name," laughed Tara as they shared the cigarette and enjoyed the drumming as it kept going deep into the night. But when she kissed Kia all she could think of was Emmy. Emmy in dreads. Tara couldn't help but smile.

She awoke in her coat. Everyone was gone and there was a frost and for a moment she thought she might be on fire, but it was the steam from her breath.

Tara slowly got up, to figure out where she was in the early morning light. There was no one here now. Not even Kia. It was like a dream of some kind, but she was wishing she were home even if it was just a mat on the floor. Now she could feel the leaves in her hair, she was a mess. She smelled of soured alcohol and sleep was like rot in her eyes.

She walked toward school, zombie like. Actually, exhausted, but somehow she'd kept going. Where else was there to go? Hopefully, she'd find the loo early and wash herself up before anyone would know. Naturally, the door was locked when she got there so she set down on the steps and hugged herself.

Now Tara felt quite sad. Maybe even disgusted with herself. What was she thinking? Being with this Kia. It probably wasn't her real name. She hugged herself more, vowing she'd never ever let herself get this way again. She knew she'd been lucky.

As she looked up at the clouds as if they might foreshadow the dreary day of rain, somebody was looking out for her. Possibly. Still, she hated her life. It wasn't ordinary like other people. Oh, how she'd take ordinary about now. Tea. Toast and jam with her studies done.

Did she really even want to go to school? She heard the door unlock. Finally. Tara hurried on to the loo and washed her raccoon like face off. The warm water helped her sensse. If only she'd thought of a shower where the girls took their exercises by the gym.

But she was tired and sore and her hair still wild with leaves and twigs. All she had were her fingers to fix it.

She flung her head down and shook her head about, but the leaves were stuck so she fingered through the mess. When she looked at herself in the mirror again, she was just a wilding, after all. Thankfully, a lone rubbe rband was near the mirror. She pulled her hair up in a ponytail on top of her head. This would have to do.

Emmy and Tara

TARA

"Just use your imagination, Babe." If her father said it one more time she was going to scream. 

As of now, or maybe a week or so, they were down and out. They were evicted from the only home she'd ever known. And now it was the two of them in Mrs. Jones' boarding house. And just a room at that, for the both of them. 

Naturally, he got the bed and she got the mat on the floor with her Hello Kitty sleeping bag. 

Of course, no one could quite imagine the magnitude of her new life. Sure, she was in the same school. Her friends hadn't changed because they didn't really know she'd changed. 

For now, she would have to remember the song in her head if she wanted to listen to music because her dad couldn't exactly afford anything these days. But then again, he was off to the pub.

So as the night crept in and she'd watched the hula-hoop dancers and listened to more drumming than she thought possible, Tara decided to stay. Where else was she to go on this October evening? Besides the only song in her head was some old Depeche Mode song where the words "Never Again is what you said the Time before."  felt endless.

Of course, she loved and hated the tune at the same time. The beat of the melody made her happy and yet when she thought of the words she became even more miserable. What on earth had Dad done with the money? Been at the cards, had he?

She did her best not to dwell on such an ill revelation, but it wouldn't exactly go away. Then her tummy started to rumble. She was sure her dad had plenty for a lager while all he'd given her was a smile and a pat on the head. 

He was truly a strange creature, but he was all she had. She didn't have normal like her friend Emmy with a Mum and Dad along with a brother who she could picture the whole family.. sitting down to a nice shepherd's pie with extra veggies on the side.. like butter carrots and peas. She closed her eyes imaging the sweet and salty taste.

Tara bet Emmy's mum had a good brew waiting as soon as Emmy got home from school.  Of course, as she sat on the park bench growing cold, she imagined brewing the tea with a spoon full of sugar and a splash of cream, just the way Emmy liked it. And she'd kiss her on the cheek.

Tara blinked. Her eyes full of thick tears. She didn't mean to imagine it. As she brushed away a tear from her hot cheek, her fingers went even colder. 

There stood a girl with red dreds. For and instance she thought she was looking at Emmy. Lord knows, Emmy wouldn't be caught with dreds. 

No, she was one to always look splendid with her bouncy red curls for Freddie. God, how Emmy wanted to impress him. Tara felt herself frowning about it.

"You feeling down? Is that it?" The girl held out some little blue pills. 

Emmy froze. What was she asking? 

The thin girl set next to her. She wasn't even wearing a jacket. At least, Tara wore a coat as night fell around them and so did the cold.

She looped her arm around Tara's.

"There's a fire going." The girl pursed her lips with such an impish smile. "We have music."

It was free. 

Tara stared at her out of the corner of her eye. Next thing she knew she was offered a little pill. Before, Tara realized it, the girl put it on her tongue and with a kiss the pill was gone.